The Doctor's Office

What would a visit to the doctor be without a blog entry immediately afterwards?

It all began with the waiting room, where I caught up with Highlights stars Goofus and Gallant* and demolished the hidden pictures in record time. An hour after my set appointment, I was called in to the doctor's office. He asked me about myself. When I explained that I was a composer, he commented that he plays the guitar for the show Deadwood, and said I should call him if I ever need a guitarist. The doctor. Only in Los Angeles.

Then he gave me my immunizations for Asia. Shots have really lost their mystique. I don't know why they were such a big deal was when I was younger. A paper cut hurts more than a shot.

Then I paid my huge co-pay (it's huge because I'm on the cheapest insurance plan possible) and left. As I was walking down the hallway the doctor's receptionist bolted out of the office, ran towards me, and handed me my receipt, which apparently I had forgotten to take when I left. Relieved, she went back into the office, and suddenly I found myself standing in the hallway holding a piece of trash. This phenomenon is a continual frustration of mine. Anytime I buy anything, I end up leaving with my product in one hand and a piece of trash in the other. And then I end up littering. I couldn't even leave the doctor's office without a piece of trash to go.


*I've been a lifelong fan of Goofus and Gallant. But I'm full of questions. What the hell is Goofus's problem? Why is he such a prick? In the issue in the waiting room, Goofus didn't treat stuff he borrows from others well. They showed him carelessly dropping a library book on the ground. And then there's Gallant, that little candy ass. Apparently Gallant treats borrowed items as if they were his own. I think there's gotta be something else going on with him, some weird shit in his past. And I'd bet anything that he's an asshole in real life to fans, like Bill Cosby.

I think they should have a modern day Goofus and Gallant. They'd show Goofus forcing himself on a struggling girl, while Gallant would always ask first. Then Goofus would "take his chances," but Gallant would pull out, etc.