Living On the Edge

There is no jaywalking in LA. Today I stood at a street corner with a bunch of people. There were no cars coming in either direction, but the red hand made it very clear that we would be waiting anyway.

And then I did it.

I walked across the street, in defiance of the red hand. People looked at me in horror. Mothers covered their children's eyes. They had seen me standing there like everyone else, not yet knowing that I dance to my own beat. That I boil water to my own temperature. A few seconds later the little white man* appeared and set the throngs of people free. But for a moment there, as I moved on with my day while dozens of people put theirs on pause, I felt extremely rational.

*In New Zealand there is a stern red man and fun-loving green man instead of the hand of discipline and the white man. I always wondered if the whole thing was an act and after work red man was actually an easy-going guy, and he and green man were actually friends. Or maybe green man let the whole thing go to his head and started acting like an insufferable "chill" person, saying things like, "Hey man, I just want to live and let live." What a douche.


Anonymous said...

L.A. teaches you not to jaywalk. That's precisely why it takes you twice as long as any other person to get across the street in any other city in the world.

Mos_Native said...

Brilliant dude!

Or alternatively hook me up with whatever you're taking, lol

Anonymous said...

That's a picture book about how the Red and green men are friends. Or might be enemies. I think one was jealous of the other