The Sad Life of a Fan

The Red Sox are hurting my feelings.

They lost their 3rd straight to Cleveland yesterday, and now must win 3 straight to advance. Which seems unlikely at the moment.

Today, I found myself calling Red Sox friends and basically doing a Halle Berry in Monster's Ball "Can you make me feel good?!" impression, asking them for words of optimism. But their feelings are hurt too.

That's what sucks about being a sports fan. At some point throughout the season, the fans of 29 of the 30 teams will end up having their feelings hurt. This year, the Red Sox had an excellent run, finally winning the division, sweeping a talented Angels team, outlasting the Yankees-- and yet now, they're one loss from crushing my gentle spirit. Even the great Patriots-- everything a sports fan could ever ask for-- have hurt my feelings both of the last two years (last year they led me to an hour-long solo walk during which I questioned my will to live).

Imagine if you had a friend that ended up leaving you in Halle Berry "Can you make me feel good?!" mode 29 out of every 30 years on average. What kind of dickish friend would that be?

And yet, I won't ever abandon my teams. I'm like a woman in an abusive relationship, who stays loyal for life despite the way she's treated. Except I have two abusive husbands (the Red Sox and Patriots), an abusive brother-in-law (the Celtics), and a bunch of abusive boyfriends-on-the-side (my annual March Madness favorites, Tiger Woods (who I always root for), my fantasy football and baseball teams, etc.). I work on dinner all day (hamburgers) and they come home and hit me. Just because I forgot to get relish. And I just keep coming back.

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

Could be worse ,at least you're not
owned by Murdoch.

frmr jhi ...

Anonymous said...

ha.. that's kinda funny. i was kinda hoping for boston and the cubbies to vs. each other in the world series :)

Anonymous said...

that's what signing jd drew and eric gagne will get you ... oh and lugo, too.

a disgusted dodger fan ...

Vra said...

The Indians couldn't shake Beckett. They even flew his ex out to sing the anthem. GO SOX!!

Anonymous said...

Being a fan of Philly sports teams, I know this feeling very well...but it looks like your Red Sox might have a chance afterall...i guess we'll find out tomorrow

Anonymous said...

Nice comparison. You should post this entry on a feminist's forum. You two would have lots to chat about. ;-)

Don Shetterly - Relaxing Piano Music said...

Too funny! I was hoping Cleveland would win... but none of my teams made it that far anyway!

Edwardo said...

It's funny rewinding through your blogs when they're already weeks old...Good thing your team is on top of their game right now!